Introductory Essay Draft Liza Veysikh

In the 1133 Writing Course, we have done three projects that each had a major goal. The first paper was a text-based paper where we used outside texts to make a larger point on an issue in Denver. The second paper was a qualitative paper where we conducted surveys and interviews to further progress of our knowledge of research. The last project was about making a google map portraying an important part of life in Denver.
For the text-based paper, I have decided to research water conservation in Denver, Colorado by describing the causes and the history behind it. The purpose of the essay was to analyze how water conservation evolved through the history of Denver, Colorado. I discussed how in the early years of Colorado, people were ignorant of water shortage and depleted the resource, but after the drought of 2002, water conservation became an important part of life for the people. At the end of the essay, I discuss what is done now to conserve water and what each of us still should do. I actually struggled with the essay because I felt that I used too many sources and most of my essay was about citations of others, and not my own discussions or my own opinion. I also had trouble introducing my quotation and just incorporated into my essay. It was the first essay and therefore I wasn’t sure how the professor wanted the essay to look like. However, from the beginning, I effectively established ethos. I rarely used pathos structure except at the end when I discussed what every person who lives in Colorado should do to prevent water scarcity. Most of the essay was about logos and facts. The audience are also Colorado residents who need to become aware of this growing problem and students who want to learn more about water in Colorado. I believe this essay to be persuasive because one of its goals is to persuade the audience to start conserving water. In the revision process, I introduced my sources in a better way and explained some of the causes of water conservation and how that related to my research.
The intention of the second paper was to further progress my knowledge of water conservation, but instead analyze a different perspective of it. I have decided to discuss the successes and failures of some of the water conservation companies and their projects, to conclude about the limits of them in reducing water shortage. Since it was a qualitative paper, I conducted three interviews. The first interview was done with a person at the Colorado Water Conservation Board located in Denver and the other two were done online with representatives of water conservation companies in Greeley, Colorado. The audience of this piece is all major water companies because they might need to re-evaluate their projects and all other Colorado residents who are faced with water conservation problems. This paper is more informative because its goals is to evaluate the efficiency of water companies in Colorado. In my revision process, I have decided to change the wording of my thesis because it was too general and could not be answered by only conducting three interviews. Also, one of the professor’s comments was that when I described my previous research concerning this project, the manner of writing was bland and did not belong in the research paper. For example, I wrote, “Some of the research I have conducted earlier…” is not relevant to my paper. I think this essay I need to work on the most because there is a lot of information in the results section that might overwhelm the reader. For the revision, I condensed the results section.
The third project on Google Maps was interesting, but very time-consuming. Especially, when it was a group project and part of the group did not want to contribute to it. So I ended up doing the whole project. Aside from that, I loved this project. It was something new and interested me a lot. For the project, we decided our topic would be public art in Denver and how it affects the lives of the people. The major concern that our professor had was that it was intended for popular audience, but we weren’t sure. For the introduction and conclusion of the project, I incorporated outside textual sources that were needed from the assignment sheet. That made the project more for the academic world, and not the common people. The audience then should be all people who appreciate and accept public art in Denver. It was mostly informative, but in the conclusion that I wrote, I appealed to pathos too showing the importance of it in the lives of the people. For the revision process, I don’t think I need to do much. Maybe explain why I incorporated outside sources, but mostly the time I put into the project, was reflected in a good grade we got.
For the outside paper from another class, I have decided to use my WRIT 1122 essay that discusses the significance of metaphor of learning as growth.
To be continued…
Throughout the quarter, I felt that my writing based solely on research has greatly improved.